Sunday, 28 January 2007
WHY DO WE HAVE A SHORT MEMORY?
I have been having a great time writing a book; have done about 260 pages of it and its amazing the memories its brought back to me. Its also set me thinking about people generally, and about the aspect of it where you suddenly become a villian when you don't fit into people's plans anymore. And we are all guilty of this, including this blogger!
Why can't we simply be like God and keep remembering the good things about others? Why do human beings have such a short memory, and when its convenient, why is it so easy to remember only the negative things about people (usually few), compared to the many good things they have done to us? Is it possible there is something inherently and iredeemably evil about our nature?
If I had the grace from God to ask Him for just ONE gift, I would unhesitatingly ask for the ability to read a man's mind. I can never get over man's ability to have done you in, and promptly proceed to sharing a drink or dinner with you. In the last 15 years or so, I have witnessed unbelievable things from people and at some point, I almost lost faith in people.
But I neednt sound so melancholy. I also have had a wonderful experience of people who also have been there and very dependably too; sadly, usually they are very few. And this brings a big lesson home to me as well...the need to do everything to be faithful to relationships, so that who knows, we may one day reduce this cycle of deceit and selfishness that we oftentimes mistake for friendship.
I will never forget a sad story that a friend told me.
Her company was going through a very tough time with a client on the issue of integrity; the client was giving them a hard time because they werent "playing ball" and giving bribes. Eventually, my friend had to end the relationship with this very difficult client.
What pained her the most (and its been so hard for her to get out of it) is that one of her most trusted staff was busy attending interviews with this difficult client while all the trouble was going on. She is sure that at some point this guy must have sold out the company on some issues, if he wanted the job and wanted to look good before his new employers.
Seriously, it was hard for me to say anything.
See you later
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2 comments:
This quite an unpleasant situation. I like your sincerity that every one is guilty including "this blogger."(LOL).
Like you said it is inherent due to the nature of our minds and we don't have God's mind.If men were God the whole world would have been....
This very nature of man that is so selfish and full of deceit is the same that breeds betrayal.
You don't have to loose faith in humans.Lets remain hopeful and make our own little efforts here there to be faithful to or relationships and pay more attention to the beautiful times, then let's see how it goes.
If you remember that no man is infalible it will help build a immunity and even when you are hurt you will forgive easily and move on after disappointments and betrayals.
to add to what ehi has said, i think the inclination to remember more of the bad exoeriences than good ones is as a result of an inborne defence mechanism in man...we simply do not want to be hurt again so those experiences which caused us pain surface faster every time we hear the person's name...for me it rather interesting because, i sometimes can't really remember the details of what the person did but the caution bells ring load all the same!!
remembring the hurt in it's self is not a bad thing but how we react to this feeling is what could be dangerous...do we see the need to be prudent when dealing with this individual as regards certain issues (money, children, house etc.)or tolerant of his/ her way of handling situations or do we prefer to hold a grudge which in the end does more damage to us?!!!
i absolutely agree that God's grace is really all we need but another problem may just arise...maybe...just maybe we might also get carried away with the memory that God did not provide the kind of 'car' (or any other request we might have) we wanted when we instructed Him to and refuse to rely on his grace!!!! i really hope this isn't the case for anyone reading this...may the joy of the Lord continue to be our strength...Amen!!!! adelola
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